Disney...happiest place on earth...NOT!

We went on a mini family vacation to Disneyland courtesy of my mother-in-law(she paid) this last weekend. This last summer we went to San Diego with her and the hubby's nephew and it was over all a pleasant experience. So when she suggested another trip to Disneyland I didn't give second thought to it. I should have taken note why my brother in law and his wife declined on vacationing with her and went without her to Disneyland this last thanksgiving when they came down. I guess either I'm in denial or dense...I will blame it on the fogginess of depression. Well what should have been a wonderful trip with memories of bonding and happiness it turned out a trip from hell. Since my meeting with her I have been respectful and accommodating to this woman who gave life to my darling husband...I did not want the stigma of the over bearing mother-in-law to taint our relationship. I swear no matter how opinionated and snooty she could get I dealt with it with a smile and even a laugh. I followed what she wanted, bent over backwards to welcome her and make her feel comfortable, cooked meals for her, cleaned up after her, had endless hours of conversation with her about knitting, sewing, how great she is....all a while all my dear hubby was at work or in another room avoiding her. I did it with grace, acceptance and yes duty. After all this woman gave birth and raised my sweet and agreeable husband....could she be as bad as what my sister-in-law told me to be.

Last year for my mother-in-laws hang gap (60th Birthday) we drove up to Sacramento to throw her a surprise birthday party...yes my idea since I was raised with Korean tradition of 60th birthday's as a big deal. My husband is American Chinese so I figured it would only be right since our cultures are similar. Well during that visit my sister-in-law and I were able to talk one on one about how they resented us because of what my MIL was saying about us..."you know they do this...and this...why can't you guys do this...so this invisible tension was looming between the siblings and their spouses because this woman had the audacity to make comparisons of her grown sons. It turns out my husbands younger brother can not stand his mother even though she watches their little boy. I guess she was abusive stating he was stupid..etc as a child and he still holds a grudge to her. All I got from my husband was she yelled alot and he ignored her...he did what she wanted to shut her up...in their minds my husband was the favorite son, although in reality he was the favorite. This was noted my own observations and aunt and uncle-in-law.

I didn't let any of this really taint my opinions of her...I thought parents are tough on the oldest usually and let it be that. But now I realize how selfish and narrow minded she is. She thinks she is always right an her way is the right way...father-in-law was a sweet man who gave into his wife. He was a very soft spoken and kind man.